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Late with my playoff picks

Late with my playoff picks

Okay, I’m a little late with my brackets, but here they are anyway.

swordandsorcerybrackets2

Tanya Roberts as Kiri
Tanya Roberts as Kiri

Obviously, there are some odd choices and upsets here. First of all, how did Kiri from Beastmaster make it into the women’s tourney?

Pure 80s hotness. One does have to put bums in seats.

(Click on the tumbnail pics for larger images.)

You may ask what James T. Kirk and the Gorn Captain doing in a Sword and Sorcery tournament? Well, Kirk wanted in, so he rewrote the computer program allocating arena space and logistics. He doesn’t like to lose.

Still, Titus Pullo should knock him unconscious in the second round, but I expect Kirk will lose his shirt.

Titus Pullo (HBO's Rome)
Titus Pullo (HBO's Rome)

You might accuse me of basing my picks on pure emotion.

If it were that, I’d have Etain and Titus Pullo going all the way, both because 2010’s Centurion deserved better notice than it received, and I’d love to see howling Pictish fury set against the trained brutality of everyone’s favorite drunken, whoremongering Roman legionary.

Those who cry “80s nostalgia” might have a better case, but Dragonslayer‘s Galen does fall to Titus Pullo in the first round…

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WAITING FOR BILBO: THE HOBBIT Begins Filming This Week

WAITING FOR BILBO: THE HOBBIT Begins Filming This Week

It’s been a long time coming and the rumors have been flying for years now. Negotiations have been made, directors have been won and lost and won again, and now it seems the Dwarves are about about to arrive in Hobbiton. The movie adaptation of J.R.R. Tolkien’s fantasy classic THE HOBBIT finally begins filming this week, specifically on March 21, in Wellington, New Zealand.

Reports coming in from Middle Earth are extremely encouraging…

hobbit12

 

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Steampunk II

Steampunk II

spYou can read my review of Steampunk II: Steampunk Reloaded by Ann and Jeff Vandermeer over at the SF Site.  Here’s the general gist:

The various VanderMeer collections stand out because of their sense of humor about genre classification lacking in most academic treatments and that they supplement terrific fiction with offbeat critical discussions, typography and other diversions of interest. A prime example here is “A Secret History of Steampunk,” a collage incorporating graphics, multiple authors, and just plain weirdness to satirize the academic research and discussion of obscure literary fragments…many of these tales are positively brilliant. Margo Lanagan’s “Machine Made” is a disturbing fable of a sexually repressed newlywed taking revenge on a doltish husband whom she discovers seeks pleasures of the flesh through a mechanical servant. Caitlín R. Kiernan’s “The Steam Dancer (1896)” relates the desires of a woman rescued from death with bionic appendages who only feels truly whole as a saloon dancer before an audience of opium addicts attentive to her body, but oblivious to her artistry. As long as we’re on the subject of mechanically enabled creatures, “The Cast Iron Kid” by Andrew Knighton presents a Western gunfight in which the title character is undone not by a six-shooter, but by principles of subatomic physics. “As Recorded on Brass Cylinders: Adagio for Two Dancers” by James L. Grant and Lisa Matchev probably could have been recast as a “mainstream” SF story in which a pair of androids share the troubling human emotions of love and loyalty;  however, put in a steampunk context, it seems to me that much more poignant..

Blogging Sax Rohmer’s The Return of Dr. Fu-Manchu, Part Eight – “The Fiery Hand”

Blogging Sax Rohmer’s The Return of Dr. Fu-Manchu, Part Eight – “The Fiery Hand”

fiery-hand“The Fiery Hand” was the eighth installment of Sax Rohmer’s Fu-Manchu and Company.   The story was first published in Collier’s on September 25, 1915 and was later expanded to comprise Chapters 24-26 of the second Fu-Manchu novel, The Devil Doctor first published in the UK in 1916 by Cassell and in the US by McBride & Nast under the variant title, The Return of Dr. Fu-Manchu.

8073861This serves as Rohmer’s variation on the haunted house story and mines the same territory as countless Sherlock Holmes pastiches where the reader is assured that the detective will arrive at a rational explanation because the other characters are convinced that the mysterious goings-on must be of supernatural origin from the start. That said, the story is an excellent one and finds Rohmer in fine form.

Inspector Weymouth calls on Nayland Smith and Dr. Petrie to enlist Smith’s aid in investigating the Gables, a property in Hampstead that appears to have been haunted for the past two years. The previous owners, a Quaker family who lived at the house for over forty years sold it after manifestations of a fiery hand holding a flaming dagger appeared. They said nothing of the incident at the time for fear of not being able to sell the property.

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Goth Chick News: 16th Annual Halloween & Attractions Best in Show

Goth Chick News: 16th Annual Halloween & Attractions Best in Show

24150_390196963255_167128213255_3900787_3094256_nLast weekend, St. Louis, MO played host to the 16th Annual Halloween & Attractions Show which was side by side with the Halloween Costume & Party Show. These events have not occurred simultaneous in several years and to have this much Halloween in one place was, well…

Let’s just say I needed to have a nice long lie down afterwards.

The HAS and the HCPS play host to vendors of every imaginable item for professional haunted attraction creators. Aisles of latex body parts, animatronic werewolves, smoke machines, scary sound effects, fake castle walls, grossly realistic masks and special effects makeup kept me engrossed for the full nine hours that the show ran on Saturday. In addition, I met several amazing artists, and a couple of horror movie directors that I’m sure you’ll recognize. But I’ll leave those as a surprise for later.

Over the coming weeks I will have the pleasure of bringing you several full-length interviews with the most intriguing people I met. But as I’ve done each year, we’ll start with a “Best in Show” list and let me say, it’s hard to stand out amidst this bloody mess. All of these items are available for purchase by the general public on the web sites indicated and represent the most innovative products for 2011.

I love this job.

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Dirty Words in Fantastic Fiction: A Writer Blogs About Process

Dirty Words in Fantastic Fiction: A Writer Blogs About Process

"Help! I'm an Anachronism!"
"Help! I'm an Anachronism!"

All writers, whatever their stripe, accomplish the bulk of their labor through the incisive, judicious choice of words.  Authors prone to world-building fantasy find themselves shackled in ways that most writers are not, limited to a surprising degree in their available terminology.  Consider, if you will, the following wonderful words: renaissance, Stilton cheese, bonobo, perestroika, taco, Hollywood, dim sum, tribologist, Ecuadoran, and haiku.

The common element?  You guessed it.  Not one of the words in that list is likely to have a place in the literature we lovingly call fantasy fiction.

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Art of the Genre: The Cat Lord

Art of the Genre: The Cat Lord

Harry Quinn shows us the serious Cat Lord
Harry Quinn shows us the serious Cat Lord
What is the Cat Lord? Well, to me it’s something my friend Mark told me about when he was reading Gord of Greyhawk back in high school, a magical character with awesome power. Having owned three cats in my lifetime, I’d say he has to be an interesting fellow, a rather profound god of feline things. This of course isn’t to be confused with Bast, the Egyptian goddess of cats, but something more D&D based.

I’d picked up D&D 1st Edition’s Monster Manual II at some point, and certainly the Cat Lord appeared in there, two great pictures of him done by Larry Elmore and Harry Quinn helping to flesh out this mysterious demi-god.

He seems an interesting enough fellow, all cats digging him, and if you ever play a campaign based on the planes, particularly Planescape, I’d suggest throwing him in. I mean, why not, he’s the perfect neutral foil to either a good or evil party who could lead the characters on a wild quest of whimsy. It doesn’t even have to be based in his home plane of The Beastlands, just throw him in anywhere, having him show up in a tavern with a girl on each arm, or maybe on a fence playing with a mouse.

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Celebrate the 30th Anniversary of Excalibur on Blu-ray

Celebrate the 30th Anniversary of Excalibur on Blu-ray

excalibur-blu-ray-cover1Excalibur (1981)
Directed by John Boorman. Starring Nigel Terry, Nicol Williamson, Helen Mirren, Nicholas Clay, Cherie Lunghi, Paul Geoffrey, Patrick Stewart, Liam Neeson, Gabriel Byrne.

One land! One king! 1080 lines of resolution!

Did you know that there is a re-make of Excalibur is in pre-production? Apparently, the lawyers at Legendary Pictures have forgotten that Le Morte d’Arthur and its associated characters are in the public domain and have been since the bleeding Dark Ages. No more about the re-make (for now).

The original, Once and Future Excalibur, is a crowning piece of high fantasy from the 1980s. It is also my favorite film version of the Arthurian legends. (Apologies to Monty Python and the Holy Grail.) Most movies about King Arthur, especially those before Excalibur upped the ante, are tatty costume dramas lacking magic, either cinematic or literal, and which feel like they were adapted from children’s editions of the story. (Apologies to Howard Pyle.) None of these movies connect to the sensations that the original telling of the legends, from Geoffrey of Monmouth, to Chrétein de Troyes, to Sir Thomas Malory’s Le Morte d’Arthur, create in me when I read them. A sense of dark mysticism pervades through the oldest versions of King Arthur’s myth: a mixture of paganism and early Christianity, a connection to Faerie, the eternal struggle between chaos and civilization. Excalibur, ignoring attempts to either look “realistic” or to resemble the generic expectation of a Hollywood costume drama, drives into the spiritual heart of King Arthur and emerges with something fantastic and often breathtaking.

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London Calling: The Iron Heel and the Literature of Ideas

London Calling: The Iron Heel and the Literature of Ideas

The Iron HeelLast week I discussed Olaf Stapledon’s Star Maker as an example of a true literature of ideas: a work structured not as a traditional narrative, with plot and character development as we know them, but instead built around the ideas that the work’s presenting, so that the book’s material is defined not by narrative but by the ideas at the core of its theme. As it happens, I recently stumbled across another example of this sort of thing.

Published in 1907, Jack London’s The Iron Heel is an imaginative account of North America sliding into a totalitarian society. London, a socialist, wrote the book as a cautionary tale about the oligarchs of his era. It’s an odd thing, mixing journalism and (what we now call) dystopic science fiction with economic hectoring. It’s slow going, particularly in the first half, but the climax is exciting adventure writing. You can see why it didn’t catch on, but it’s still worth looking at.

(You can read the book here, here, or over here, or listen to an audio version over here. I note there was recently a piece about the book on Daily Kos; you can find that here.)

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Monstrous Post on Monsters II: Full Sequence

Monstrous Post on Monsters II: Full Sequence

See Item 1.
See Item 1.

When I first crawled to the surface to whisper of monsters in your ears — before pinching off those delectable auricles with my first layer of incisors — I said I’d be back in a month with a lowdown on the greatest monsters from the pages of heroic fantasy, maybe even with a Top 10.

Sure, three of your months have passed, but why would a creature of the abyss even give a damn about human timetables? As for a Top 10 — well, to be clear, I regard your arithmetic and integers in equal contempt. In truth there are only two ways in which you matter: either when you’re sustenance (i.e. lunch) or making a complete troublesome nuisance out of yourselves with your flaming swords, silver bullet-shooting AK-47s and your brandishings of various items of religious iconography for the sake of the futile postponement of your inevitable fate (as lunch).

See Item 2.
See Item 2.

As evidence of the innate inferiority of your puny mortal selves, I proffer the fact that your responses to my request to name the titans in the pantheon of monsters were, as your kind says, all over the map. I hypothesized that beyond Grendel and Tolkien the monsters that populate heroic fantasy haven’t been so shiver-some, and indeed most of you extended trembling hands into other subgenres to draw out the denizens that frighten you most. (With one major exception, which I will explain in detail when I’m good and ready.)

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