Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone – 3 Good Reasons: ‘Murder is No Joke’

Monday, October 12, 2026 Bob Byrne Comments 0 Comment

I haven’t written about Nero Wolfe in a year and-a-half? Flummery! Most NOT satisfactory. So…

Welcome to another installment of 3 Good Reasons. With a goal of eventually tackling every tale of the Corpus, I’ll give three reasons why the particular story at hand is the best Nero Wolfe of them all. Since I’m writing over seventy ‘Best Story’ essays, the point isn’t actually to pick one – just to point out some of what is good in every adventure featuring Wolfe and Archie. And I’ll toss in one reason it’s not the best story. Now – These essays will contain SPOILERS. You have been warned!

The Story

Today’s story is “Murder is No Joke” from And Four To Go. It’s the fourth and final story, and a bit of a ‘debutante at the wrong ball.’ Each of the first three has a holiday theme

Flora Gallant is worried about the influence which the mysterious Bianca Voss has over her brother Alec; an internationally acclaimed fashion designer. A call to Bianca, from Wolfe’s office, goes awry when Voss is apparently murdered while on the other end of the line. Inspector Cramer finds it awfully convenient, and Wolfe sets out to identify the miscreant who

3 GOOD REASONS

ONE – Watson. John H. Watson

Archie calls the office, saying something may have happened to Miss Voss. He waits and is asked his name when a man comes back on the line. “Watson. John H. Watson.”

This is sheer chutzpah. There’s no more famous ‘assistant to the detective’ in all the mystery genre, than good ol’ Dr. Watson. Imagine dropping Hecule Poirot, or Perry Mason, as his name. Of course, Carl Drew is flustered, having just discovered Bianca Voss dead in her office. But this sheer Archie impudence.

And while Arthur Conan Doyle never said what Watson’s middle name was, thanks to Dorothy L. Sayers, a lot of Sherlockians prefer ‘Hamish,’ which is Scottish for James. It’s better in Scottish. John J(ames) Watson doesn’t really stand out.

TWO – The Sound of the Rotary Phone

I’m stretching a little, as this story is in the lower echelon of my rankings. And this could be the one bad reason, too. Wolfe is not a Sherlock Holmes, who makes deductions from observing the color of clay on someone’s boot. And you’ll sure as heck never see him crawling over the floor with a magnifying glass (though he does use one).

But a key part of Wolfe solving the case, was his using the way different numbers on a rotary phone sound, when used. Since the first Wolfe story is approaching 100 years old, I’ll assume readers are familiar with rotary phones.

Wolfe dials two phone numbers the client had dialed from his office, and matching it to his memory, determines she was up to some flummery. He repeats the process with Archie, who confirms things. This isn’t quite looking at dirty boots, but it ventures into the Holmes realm further than Wolfe goes. It’s tenuous, but it feels out of place. And it’s both on the good side; Wolfe doing something nobody else would likely have. Though it’s using his prodigious memory and intellect: not eclectic knowledge and observation. While on the bad side, it feels like something a pastiche writer would have Wolfe do. Not authentic Stout. So, it’s got a unique feel to it, which sets it apart.

THREE – Fast-Paced Mystery

Flora Gallant has an appointment at 11 AM on a Tuesday morning. Sometime after 6:30 PM the next evening, with Cramer in the office, the suspects – and client – show up on the stoop. Wolfe has an impromptu ‘charade,’ with the Inspector watching in the secret room, behind the waterfall picture.

There’s no relapse; no Archie spending a day being grilled by various city officials (he does chat for a few hours with assistant DA Brill); no waiting on Saul or Fred to check in; no getting Nathaniel Parker to bail somebody out of jail. Wolfe unequivocally wraps this up, with a confession in front of the police, in less than a day and-a-half. Granted, he makes Cramer mad in just a day, but that’s no big surprise.

ONE BAD REASON

Why Do I Care?

In almost every story, there’s some character that I’m interested in. Might not be somebody to like, but they’re pulling me along in the story. Except for Archie and Wolfe, there’s nobody in this story I care about. Any or all of them could have been the killer, or been murdered themselves. Flora, her brother, the other employees; who cares?

I think this is why it’s a story I rarely re-read. The other three stories And Four To Go are all pretty good. I’m not invested in this one at all. The characters are not compelling. And the two murder victims aren’t even sympathetic. The characters, the rotary phone piece, no Saul, Orrie, or Fred: This is a bland story.

MISCSELLANEA

The story originally appeared in April of 1958 in And Four To Go, with Christmas Party, Easter Parade, and Fourth of July Picnic. As mentioned, this one did not have a holiday theme.

Stout revised it and it appeared as “Frame-Up for Murder” in the June 21 and 28, 1958 issues of The Saturday Evening Post. Same premise, but different killer. Was included in 1985’s Death Times Three.

The CBC radio series starring Maver Moore, adapted this story. Fritz has a more active role, which improves it a bit.

Wolfe wrote this story twice, and both times, Alec Gallant suffers greatly. Gallant had learned after WW II that his wife and her two brothers were traitors to the French Resistance. He killed the brothers but she escaped. Then she reappeared in his life later.

We’ve seen these kinds of things in movies and books, where the villain eventually pays the price for their treachery. And Bianca Voss does die, but not really related to what she did. Nobody else knew about it. And Alec doesn’t serve any kind of justice to her. She blackmails him and he lives in fear of her. This isn’t exactly how the reader wants things to go. We want Alec to finish the job. Or at least see her exposed and punished.

But in this story, his sister is nailed for murder. In the re-write, it’s his girlfriend who is a key employee. I don’t dig into ‘beneath the surface stuff’ in Wolfe stories. But Gallant is somebody we root for (nobody’s rooting for the traitors and blackmailers), and Wolfe gives him a crappy ending both times. As if he isn’t allowed to be happy, after what he had done (he did murder two people).

I like the scenes with Wolfe and Cramer in this short story. For that alone, I would like to have seen A&E do this one.

YOU DON’T SAY

Bianca Voss – “I know your name, ye! You are scum, I know, in your stinking sewer. Your slimy little ego in your big gob of fat! And you dare to- owulggh!”

Cramer – “I don’t like gags about homicide, murder is no joke, but I can mention that Bianca Voss had you wrong. Sum. Stinking sewer. Orchids don’t smell.”

Purley Stebbins – “You. Huh? Sightseeing? The scene of the crime?”

Archie – “Just morbid. Compulsion neurosis. Is this it?”

Archie – “…It’s not a right, it’s a liberty. I have no right to ask you to have dinner with me this evening, which might not be a bad idea, but I’m at liberty to, and you’re at liberty to tell me you’d rather dine at the automat with a baboon, only that wouldn’t be very polite. Also, when I ask if you have any letters from Sarah Yare you’re a liberty to tell me to go climb a tree if you find the question ticklish. I might add that I would be at liberty to climb a pole instead of a tree. Have you any letters from Sarah Yare?”

More From the Brownstone

Stay at Home

Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone

Meet Nero Wolfe
The R-Rated Nero Wolfe
Radio & Screen Wolfe
A&E’s ‘A Nero Wolfe Mystery’
The Lost 1959 Pilot
The Mets in “Please Pass the Guilt”
A Matter of Identity (original story)
Death of a Doxy; and Koufax or Mays?
Hercule Poirot Visits Nero Wolfe
I Know that Actor!
The Big Store (Wolf J. Flywheel)
Welcome to Kanawha Spa – The Wolfe Pack 2024 Greenbrier Weekend
A Toast To Nero Wolfe – From the Wolfe Pack 2024 Greenbrier Weekend

3 Good Reasons

3 Good Reasons – ‘Black Orchids’
3 Good Reasons – ‘Not Quite Dead Enough’
3 Good Reasons – ‘Murder is Corny’
3 Good Reasons – ‘Immune to Murder’
3 Good Reason – ‘Booby Trap’

The Greenstreet Chronicles (Pastiches based on the Radio Show)

Stamped for Murder

The Careworn Cuff – Part One
The Careworn Cuff – Part Two
The Careworn Cuff – Part Three

Bob Byrne’s ‘A (Black) Gat in the Hand’ made its Black Gate debut in 2018 and has returned every Summer since.

His ‘The Public Life of Sherlock Holmes’ column ran every Monday morning at Black Gate from March, 2014 through March, 2017. And he irregularly posts on Rex Stout’s gargantuan detective in ‘Nero Wolfe’s Brownstone.’ He is a member of the Praed Street Irregulars, and founded www.SolarPons.com (the only website dedicated to the ‘Sherlock Holmes of Praed Street’).

He organized Black Gate’s award-nominated ‘Discovering Robert E. Howard’ series, as well as the award-winning ‘Hither Came Conan’ series. Which is now part of THE Definitive guide to Conan. He also organized 2023’s ‘Talking Tolkien.’

He has contributed stories to The MX Book of New Sherlock Holmes Stories — Parts III, IV, V, VI, XXI, and XXXIII.

He has written introductions for Steeger Books, and appeared in several magazines, including Black Mask, Sherlock Holmes Mystery Magazine, The Strand Magazine, and Sherlock Magazine.

You can definitely ‘experience the Bobness’ at Jason Waltz’s ’24? in 42′ podcast.