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Author: Sue Granquist

Goth Chick News – JP4: A Whole New Lizard, or Just Another Clone?

Goth Chick News – JP4: A Whole New Lizard, or Just Another Clone?

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image0023Let’s start with the picture on the left.

This is the back of my SUV. I would like to draw your attention to the customized wheel cover one of my artist friends presented me with a couple Christmases ago. If you were sitting in the driver’s seat you’d be perfectly positioned to see my Jurassic Park Test Vehicle Identification Tag hanging alongside a tiny Velociraptor.

This of course proves I am a geek. We established that quite some time ago so let’s move on. What this really proves is that I’m a huge movie geek with a major Jurassic Park fixation, which coincidentally positions me perfectly to deliver the following news in the most expert of fashion.

JP4 is coming and I can prove it. Whether this is a good thing or a bad thing is up to you to decide, but I think you’ll agree it’s at least worth imagining at this point.

Let’s start with the basics in case some of you were still in diapers when this story kicked off

The original 1993 Jurassic Park movie, which earned over $914 million, and the sequel The Lost World: Jurassic Park, which earned $618 million, were based upon novels by Michael Crichton, who died unexpectedly in November 2008. Jurassic Park 3 departed from Crichton’s story line and was largely considered “the end” of the franchise due to its very poor box office performance.

What you probably have already heard is that Steven Spielberg raised the hopes of geeks everywhere by telling fans at San Diego’s Comic Con that a new JP sequel might be coming out “in two or three years.” Spielberg also mentioned he might oversee the new project as a producer.

But I’ve got some additional scoop you may not have heard.

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Goth Chick News: 13 Questions for Robert Browne, Author of The Paradise Prophecy

Goth Chick News: 13 Questions for Robert Browne, Author of The Paradise Prophecy

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image0022In spite of it being a gorgeous, sunny couple of weeks in Chicago, I remain unnaturally pasty.

No, that’s not normal for me, but thanks for asking.

Even I occasionally venture out of the subterranean offices of the Black Gate headquarters for a little fresh air, some more salt for the margaritas, or to affix sticky notes with snarky comments on the paint-ball equipment posters of the boys in the upstairs staff room.

But for the last few days I have remained glued to my comfy chair and Robert Browne is to blame.

One of the joys of this job is the occasional pre-publication copy of a soon-to-be-released book. Even more joyful are those that turn out to be a decent read. But the pinnacle and rarest of joys is the book that is one-of-a-kind special.

The Paradise Prophecy is one of those.

Not that I wasn’t prepared to be skeptical (because frankly when am I not?). But almost literally from the first page I was hooked. And so there I sat in my comfy chair; bereft of vitamin D and not even bothering to reach over to press “crush” on the blender controls, totally enslaved by one of the most uniquely told tales I’ve come across in a very long time.

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Goth Chick News: Kolchak Stalks Again

Goth Chick News: Kolchak Stalks Again

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image0101You remember him, I know you do.

A wise-cracking, would-be-hard-bitten newsman in a battered seersucker suit and straw hat looking like he just stepped out of a 1940’s gumshoe flick — except for that slick, yellow Ford Mustang convertible he’s tooling around in.

But Carl Kolchak took a wrong turn somewhere and ended up in a couple of 1970’s TV movies and a short-lived TV show in which he kept stumbling across increasingly outrageous news stories that not only put his life in imminent danger, but inevitably involved horrific supernatural or paranormal beings.

Cue the distinctive, whistled theme music and pull up a 1970’s faux leatherette lounge chair (orange preferably); it’s time for The Night Stalker…

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Goth Chick News: Old Dog, New “Twixt”

Goth Chick News: Old Dog, New “Twixt”

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image002The cool thing about Francis Ford Coppola (minus the “Ford” bit if you followed his work in the ‘80’s) is that, chances are he’s responsible for at least one movie in your top ten, regardless of your favorite genre.

From The Godfather and Apocalypse Now, to Peggy Sue Got Married and The Cotton Club, Coppola has never stuck to one movie “type,” but instead stretched his creativity into many corners for better or worse. Love them or hate them (or in some cases both), I’m betting Coppola movies can be found among your favorite quotes, your DVD collection or your Netflix queue.

But though he’s easily associated with making “an offer (you) can’t refuse,” Coppola is possibly least known for his forays into horror; though arguably this is his roots.

Beginning in 1963 with his first big budget film The Terror starring Jack Nicholson in one of his first roles and Boris Karloff in one of his last, Coppola followed up with Dementia 13 later that same year.

By his own admission, horror is where Francis Ford got a foothold in Hollywood.

However, it would be another thirty years before Coppola would return to the genre that gave him his break.

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Goth Chick News: Time To See More Dead People

Goth Chick News: Time To See More Dead People

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image0101Believe me, fighting off the urge to be snarky every time I read something about Slasher Films is an exercise in self control.

If you recall, back in January I told you about the Guns ‘n Roses guitarist “Slash” who had just announced the launch of his new horror movie production company with a very cheesy name.

This had all the elements that make for a good rip on how running around looking like a rock and roll version of Son of Svengoolie doesn’t automatically mean you can make a palatable scary movie. However, before I was able to launch into a truly hardy, sarcastic tirade I was struck by the seemingly intriguing story lines that would be the first few big screen releases.

Maybe, just maybe this was going to be good after all.

Originally, Slasher Films announced four new projects; Nothing to Fear, Theorem, The Other Kingdom and Wake the Dead, billed as a film version of the graphic novel by Steve Niles who also happens to be Slash’s business partner.

This week we learned which of these concepts are going to become reality first.

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Goth Chick News: Colin Farrell Can Bite Me

Goth Chick News: Colin Farrell Can Bite Me

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image0022If you’re looking for a sparkly vampire who marries humans rather than eats them, check back in around November when I can promise you there will be no mention of such atrocities here.

No way.

Here at Goth Chick News we do not condone the colorization of black and white movies, the censoring of controversial reading material or, blasphemy of blasphemies, the wussification of folklore monsters. Here, the Wolfman is not “misunderstood,” Frankenstein is the name of the doctor, not the monster and vampires are ruthless killers without the slightest bit of angst.

In other words; Colin Farrell.

If unlike me, you don’t have a widget countdown clock on your computer screen checking off the minutes until August 19th then let me remind you that is the release date for Fright Night.

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Goth Chick News: Zombie Contamination and Other Stuff You’ll Only Find Here

Goth Chick News: Zombie Contamination and Other Stuff You’ll Only Find Here

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image0021Fresh from their final exams and smelling strongly of AXE body spray, the new batch of summer interns creeps tentatively down the stone steps into the underground offices of Goth Chick News. After orientation, which in this case includes a thorough hosing off, they are scurrying around collecting information for their first assignment.

Akin to the pleasure of taking the Margarita salt out from its long winter storage is the joy of taking on twice as many interns as necessary and making them fight each other to the death in their first week, to remain one of the chosen few.

“Bring me pop horror culture!” I shout; frothy frozen cocktail in one hand and riding crop in the other. “And make sure it’s fresh! We’re not running some crappy Ryan-Seacrest-production here!”

C.S.E. Cooney laughs maniacally from the corner and asks if she can have a go with the riding crop.

Summer is definitely in the air at Black Gate headquarters.

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Goth Chick (International) News: Iranian Ghost Stories For Real

Goth Chick (International) News: Iranian Ghost Stories For Real

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image003As I mention whenever given the opportunity, I have some exceedingly cool friends. I don’t tell you this to brag, but rather to ensure I am able to soak up some of their residual coolness in the telling.

As you are well aware, I am a total movie-quoting, comic-reading, gamer geek who was often taken in by hoopy froods** (<– Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy reference. See? Can’t help myself) for their entertainment and social balancing. Still, the result has been pretty consistent. I get to hang out with people who really know where their towels are.

That being said, let me tell you about my friend “M.”

“M” is Iranian and I met him at my small, mid-Western alma mater where his very affluent, liberal but politically active family had tucked him away due to credible kidnapping threats. And yes, if you’re doing the math, I was an undergrad in a school that was the last ever place for the son of an affluent, liberal, politically active Iranian family to ever be located. In fact, it was so off the map that only those of us who went there could consistently point it out on one.

Following the standard number of years of undergraduate shenanigans, “M” went into public service in Canada of all places, eventually landing a highly visible gig in a Canadian embassy in a country I have sworn not to name. As you can see, I’ve sworn not to say a lot about “M,” for reasons that would make very interesting posts some time in the future when “M” is no longer in public life.

But that time is not now.

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Goth Chick News: Traveling the YellowBrickRoad With Andy Mitton and Jesse Holland

Goth Chick News: Traveling the YellowBrickRoad With Andy Mitton and Jesse Holland

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image002Last week I had the pleasure of bringing you an early look at the new indy horror film YellowBrickRoad. But much like the elusive Great and Powerful Oz himself, YBR writers and directors Andy Mitton and Jesse Holland wished to remain firmly behind the curtain until the movie was released. YBR hit select AMC theaters nationwide on June 1st and true to their word, the magicians responsible for this amazing story have come over for a chat.

And a good thing to, because it wasn’t like the curiosity hadn’t already gotten to me when I picked up last weekend’s Chicago Tribune to find a sizable write up about YBR. After spending the first moment gloating over how I’d gotten there first, I spent the second moment amazed at how the local movie critic, who generally hates everything but foreign films with subtitles, seemed to have fallen breathlessly in love the YBR.

In the third moment I was manic with questions (how the heck does an indy film get a distribution deal with AMC and a Chicago Tribune accolade anyway?) and sprinting for the computer.

Thankfully, Jesse and Andy were ready to dish the deets on what is so far my favorite horror flick of 2011, indy and mass market included.

So grab a munchkin and a lollipop and come in a little closer; the men on the YellowBrickRoad have an interesting tale to tell.

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Goth Chick News: Following the YellowBrickRoad

Goth Chick News: Following the YellowBrickRoad

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image0041Sometimes I feel a Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, only different.

I do have a dog (three actually) but even the smallest one wouldn’t fit into a wicker basket and they’d treat Toto like a chew toy. The ruby colored shoes I own are not constructed for long distance walking and if you ever catch me in poufy sleeves and gingham, please just put me out of my misery. Chicago does get the occasional tornado, but it would be an exceptional storm indeed that could pick up my house and set it down on a fortuitous target that I’d never, ever equate to my mother-in-law, at least not in writing.

However, I do have a few really cool friends who are exceptionally good at introducing me to very interesting people. They are wonderful traveling companions, knowing precisely the types of twisted adventures I enjoy. And though I’ve never exactly met a Great and Powerful Oz, generally when I agree to go with them somewhere, the results are often adrenaline-rushing, sometimes heart-thumping, and every once in awhile, mind-blowing.

In this particular case, my traveling companions are Brad Miska from Bloody Disgusting and film makers Jesse Holland and Andy Mitton. And yes, there’s even a real yellow brick road; but in this case it pretty much leads straight to Hell.

Though Brad runs the world’s most popular horror website, we actually became acquainted in such a ridiculously normal way that I’m actually embarrassed. Somehow it seems that “Mr. Disgusting” and Goth Chick should have met in some underground S&M bar in Taiwan (not that I have any independent knowledge of said S&M bar).

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