Black Gate

I only remember two things about the 1998 remake of the pop culture film Godzilla (and that’s saying quite a lot since most people don’t remember it at all).

The first is that it starred Ferris Bueller, I mean Matthew Broderick, in a role that was in no danger of making us forget his previous day off.

Second, I remember thinking how nice it was for Tri-Star Pictures to put the lizard effects guys from Jurassic Park back to work. Their unemployment benefits had very nearly run out since The Lost World wrapped in 1997.

Godzilla movies and their collective cheesiness have always been fun in an Ed Wood sort of way, but the 1998 version was cringe-worthy on a whole different scale: which is why I have always fantasized about ambushing Sarah Jessica Parker at a red carpet event to ask her how it feels to be married to the star of a cinematic pile of lizard poop.

And though such a statement might cause Ms. Parker to fall right off her $1200 pumps, it is clearly no such deterrent to the rest of Hollywood who apparently has never met a remake they didn’t like.

Get Industrial Light and Magic on the phone and let’s hope they haven’t chucked those velociraptor puppets…

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At a recent family function my 11-year-old nephew pulled me aside to say, “A friend of mine at school saw the Tall Man.”

Now it’s common knowledge among all the kids in the family, as well as their friends, that Aunt Goth Chick is conversant with all topics of the otherworldly variety. When they were all a bit younger I had a fabulous time not dispelling the notion that I was a substitute professor at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

As they got a bit older my role was to correct misconceptions about whether or not vampires were really afraid of crosses, or whether wolfmen actually turned all the way into wolves at the full moon.

But now, in that misty gray, pre-teen area between believers and skeptics, the local chapter of the Goth Chick Fan Club – Junior League needs to be handled carefully; take them too seriously and I could easily be sidelined as covertly making fun of them, not taking them seriously enough could result in the same.

And frankly, I enjoy my minor celebrity status as much as I enjoy being reminded of a time in everyone’s life when magic and mystery were still very possible and very real.

So even though I had never heard of the Tall Man, the seriousness in the little guy’s face told me it was something important and a topic that I, of all people, should be versed in. Luckily the arrival of dessert saved me from needing to make an in depth response and bought me the time to do a little homework.

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Apparently The Woman in Black truly is a supernatural, immortal being.

When we first told you about it, the seriously creepy novel by Susan Hill was a long-running play in London’s West End, a made-for-TV movie in the UK, and barely a rumor from Hammer Films about a theatrical remake starring Daniel Radcliffe (Harry Potter); which turned out to be true after all.

Thankfully that bit about it potentially being shot in 3D never materialized…

At least not yet.

Hammer Films, which grossed $112 million globally on a $17 million investment has already made the no-brainer announcement that it’s moving forward with a sequel and perhaps more.

The Woman in Black: Angels of Death is currently in development with Jon Crocker once again writing the script based on a story by Susan Hill.

But don’t look for this one at your local bookseller, at least until after the movie is released sometime in 2014. Ms. Hill got busy on the follow up at the behest of Hammer Films.

The first film saw Radcliffe as lawyer Arthur Kipps who travels to Eel Marsh House on an assignment, only to discover the house belonging to his client is haunted by the ghost of a woman who is determined to find someone and something she lost.

The Woman in Black: Angels of Death will take place during World War II, forty years after the events in the original. Daniel Radcliffe will likely not be involved though there have been some recent rumblings that a cameo isn’t out of the question for continuity reasons.

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Those of you who are fans of Game of Thrones (the books or the HBO series) are already well aware that when civilizations build walls, it’s usually to keep something really nasty on the other side of them. In the case of “The Wall” which borders the Seven Kingdoms of GoT, the 300 miles of solid ice stands between humanity and an army of corpse-collecting, walking dead.

Which sort of makes you wonder; what are other really big walls meant to keep out?

The Great Wall of China for instance…

Oh sure, it might really have been to keep out the Mongols. But what if it was something worse?

In the spring of 2013, Legendary East, an offshoot of Legendary Pictures (late of The Dark Knight Rises), will begin shooting its first project The Great Wall in both China and New Zealand.

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There’s almost nothing as cool as getting an exclusive — unless it’s an exclusive from an up-and-coming film maker.

When one considers that every director who ever created a blockbuster was once a struggling artist thrashing about in the low-budget trenches, one imagines that when said directors finally hit the big time, they’ll remember those who recognized genius and encouraged them in their leaner years, then invite those people to high-power lunch meetings and red-carpet events which steadfast supporters can only daydream about today.

Right, Wyatt?

Wyatt Weed from Pirate Pictures, along with his colleagues at State of Mind Productions, are the creative force behind the new indy short-film project Outpost 13 and they’ve granted an exclusive screening to Black Gate readers before the film is released to the wider viewing audience.

Yes, that’s right. An exclusive. Which ranks Wyatt Weed above Ridley Scott, who only sends us the trailers about five minutes before everyone else gets them.

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There’s just no point in continuing to harp on this whole remake / reboot craze that Hollywood seems to be suffering from the last few years.

True that the lack of innovation is depressing and the originals are almost always better, but you can probably think of at least one movie that you’d be interested to see in the light of a new generation of special effects.

So with that firmly in mind, let’s dust off the formalwear, order some carnations, drop by that slaughter house on the outskirts of town and once again, take Carrie White to the prom.

If you recall, the original Carrie of 1976 had Sissy Spacek in the waif-like, telekinetic, bullying-victim lead role, while Piper Laurie played her nutso, religious fanatic Mommy-dearest, Margaret.

Margaret White is, in many ways, the center of the horror classic and undoubtedly one of the most disturbing characters ever seen on screen. Associating sex and puberty with shame and sin, Mrs. White turned her tortured daughter’s home into another place of torment instead of a sanctuary.

Spitting out lines like, “They’re all gonna’ laugh at you,” and “I can see your dirty pillows,” Laurie created a psycho movie mom that would make you want to spend the holidays with Joan Crawford.

Now four-time Oscar nominee Julianne Moore will attempt to top Laurie’s Oscar-nominated performance; she has signed on to play Margaret White in the upcoming Carrie remake.

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