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“Are You Not Still Entertained?”: Gladiator’s 10-Year Oscar Anniversary

“Are You Not Still Entertained?”: Gladiator’s 10-Year Oscar Anniversary

gladiator-posterAs of Sunday evening, The King’s Speech is the newest Academy Award winner for Best Picture. I am sure a virulent backlash against the English period drama is already underway, but let the record show that I thoroughly enjoyed that movie. It is not my personal pick for the best film of 2010. I would have liked Black Swan, Inception, or True Grit to win, but such was not to be, and The King’s Speech as a winner doesn’t anger me.

However, I prophesy that The King’s Speech will go down in history as one of the Oscar winners with scant staying power. Remember Shakespeare in Love? Chances are you haven’t thought of it much at all. The same can be said for numerous winners since the awards started in 1929: movies that had their moment, and then faded back as the “losers” turned into perennials. No one has much interest in Cavalcade (winner for 1933, the year of King Kong and Duck Soup) or The Great Ziegfield (winner for 1936) today; 1952’s The Greatest Show on Earth is the butt of jokes about “Worst Best Picture Ever”; and even the recent A Beautiful Mind has blipped off the pop-culture radar fast, while Crash’s win tends to get people upset.* I can even mount an argument that the massively popular win for Forrest Gump has been overshadowed in the ensuing years by the everlasting popularity of two of its competitors, The Shawshank Redemption and Pulp Fiction.

But many Academy wins have lasted. It is amazing to realize that Casablanca was a surprise victory in 1943, upsetting favorite Watch on the Rhine. When was the last time you quoted or heard someone quote Watch on the Rhine? Other enduring winners include The Sound of Music, Gone with the Wind, Rocky, Platoon, and from the last twenty years The Silence of the Lambs (this year is its twentieth anniversary as a winner) and Unforgiven.

Which brings me to this year’s tenth-anniversary winner. Where does Ridley Scott’s Roman epic Gladiator stand today, a decade after it received five Oscars at the 73rd Annual Academy Awards?

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Goth Chick Crypt Notes: Hell Rises Again

Goth Chick Crypt Notes: Hell Rises Again

drive-angryWith March just around the corner there’s a tiny whiff of spring in the air and here at the Black Gate offices this means attention spans are running even shorter than normal.

With the boys busy sniffing last year’s Hawaiian shirts for potential (and highly unlikely) freshness, and polishing off the last of the Amber Ale to make room in the communal fridge for the MGD 64, all thoughts have turned to flip-flop and cargo shorts weather, leaving room for additional content at Blackgate.com.

Therefore, to save myself having to listen to one more chorus of “Marguerita-ville,” I’m shutting myself up with the espresso machine in the underground offices of Goth Chick News.

My plan is to pass the time down here until May by bringing you one additional helping of extra gooey, pop-culture goodness each week.

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Goth Chick News: Barnabas Collins Rises

Goth Chick News: Barnabas Collins Rises

image0061Though I would normally start this post by ranting about the lack of originality in Hollywood and threaten to stick my thumbs in the Black Gate blender if yet one more remake crawls into a theater near me, I’m brought up short by news of a project with a serious pedigree.

Dark Shadows is slated to start production this Spring for an early 2012 release.

If you tell me you aren’t acquainted with Mr. Barnabas Collins I will first need to inquire how the weather here compares with your home in the Congo, and did you have a pleasant flight into civilization yesterday? I would then go on to tell you that Dark Shadows was a first-of-its-kind gothic soap opera dealing primarily with supernatural themes and if, like me, you were to discover it for the first time while watching contraband reruns at a 10-year-old’s birthday sleepover, it would have scared the crap out of you.

First impressions, no matter how traumatic, can stick with a person for a lifetime and Dark Shadows clearly stuck with a large segment of the population.

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Back to the Ninth Legion . . . Yep, Still Lost: The Eagle

Back to the Ninth Legion . . . Yep, Still Lost: The Eagle

the_eagle_posterThe Eagle (2011)
Directed by Kevin Macdonald. Starring Channing Tatum, Jamie Bell, Donald Sutherland, Mark Strong, Tahar Rahim.

Less than a year after Centurion was released theatrically on a small number screens, along comes another historical adventure film telling the tale of the vanished Ninth Legion. Except The Eagle got released on many screens. In a just and fair movie world, the situation would be the opposite. But anybody who has every griped about the Academy Awards knows that we live in no such world. (And by the way . . . no Best Score nomination for Daft Punk’s work on TRON Legacy?)

The Eagle is the opposite of Neil Marshall’s incredibly energetic, almost gonzo Centurion. Marshall’s film uses a great cast to flesh out its characters and themes of survival and duty while keeping an insane and glorious momentum. At every turn, Centurion does its damndest to keep audience’s adrenaline high. The Eagle, given greater dramatic space for characters between battle scenes, sketches out complete blanks for protagonists, contains no sense of the Roman frontier, and features poorly shot and edited battle scenes that emit out not single nanowatt of excitement. (Oh, I’ll be generous. Not a single microwatt of excitement.) No wonder Focus Features unceremoniously dumped this film out in early February, during Valentine’s Day weekend, up against a kid’s CGI animated movie and romantic comedy starring Adam Sandler. The Eagle is totally disposable.

And given the subject matter, it’s a shame. I hate to see any movie mess up the wonders that the Roman Empire can deliver in terms of action and spectacle. It takes a tremendous amount of work to make me dislike a film about the empire, but dammit if director Kevin Macdonald (The Last King of Scotland, State of Play) and his cast and crew put in overtime to produce a boring film.

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Goth Chick News: Get That Raven an Agent

Goth Chick News: Get That Raven an Agent

image002Here is definitive proof there is life after death.

Over the last couple years, the lovely Ms. Betty White has been blogged, tweeted and Facebooked back into the Hollywood limelight at the age of 89. She is “cute” and “sweet” and now apparently even “hot” by the standards of an entertainment industry which generally saves its highest praise and adoration for the youthful (or at least the youthful appearing).

Betty White’s resurgence of popularity is nothing short of miraculous when taken in this context.

However, relatively speaking, Ms. White is jail bait beside Mr. Edgar Allen Poe, who last month turned 202 and seems to be enjoying a second public life of his own.

And the one thing he is which Betty White definitely is not (as far as we know) is dead; a state Poe has been in for 162 years but which is not stopping him from recently getting his name in the press, or starring in several upcoming Hollywood projects.

Of course it doesn’t hurt to be terminally interesting as well.

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The Mystical Viking: Valhalla Rising

The Mystical Viking: Valhalla Rising

valhalla_rising_poster_dkValhalla Rising (2009)
Directed by Nicolas Winding Refn. Starring Mads Mikkelson, Jamie Sives, Gary Lewis, Ewan Stewart, Maarten Stevenson.

Danish director Nicolas Winding Refn went into his film Valhalla Rising right as he was wrapping up post-production on Bronson, the bizarre biopic about British prisoner Charlie Bronson that turned into his biggest success and pushed star Tom Hardy into the front lines. But Bronson surprised many viewers, going against expectations of what a biopic about Charlie Bronson would be like. In the same way, Valhalla Rising flips around the conceptual idea of “Viking movie” and is unlike anything viewers might expect from an historical epic about skull-crushers like the medieval Norsemen. Valhalla Rising had its festival premiere in 2009 and a theatrical release in mid-2010, but it sits defiantly outside the mainstream. If El Topo is an “Acid Western,” then consider Valhalla Rising an “Acid Viking Movie.”

Although it clocks in at a lean 92 minutes with credits, Refn’s film moves at a slow pace and contains vast silences within a harsh landscape. The first twelve minutes contain only a single line of dialogue, and this sparse style remains consistent throughout the running time. Red-hued violence occasionally breaks out, done with no modern stylization, but there are no “action set-pieces.” This is a movie concerned with its tone and texture, telling an oblique story through implication. And for what it attempts to do, it succeeds: this is a transcendent film that creates an authentic sense of what Nordic life in the eleventh century must have felt like. Its taciturn introspection says an enormous amount about early Christian and late Pagan mysticism.

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Goth Chick News: “Slasher Films”… Really?

Goth Chick News: “Slasher Films”… Really?

image0043I was right on the verge of having a field day with this and it couldn’t have come at a better time.

It starts with today being exactly 24 hours past my usual Black Gate deadline. The events leading up to this would appear to be insignificant, but trust me when I say their aggregated affect — culminating in the toilet set being left up (again) in the “unisex” Black Gate bathroom — had wreaked utter havoc with my normally cheery disposition.

But then a ray of sunshine penetrated the underground bunker of the Goth Chick offices; a statement so rife with possibilities that I was mentally riffing on it before the final syllable was spoken.

“Slash is starting a horror movie production company.”

Oh yes, it was going to be a good day after all.

Let me back up and color this in a bit for you.

The year is 1988 and a hair band out of Los Angeles called Guns n’ Roses finally scores a number one hit with “Sweet Child o’ Mine.” There’s a guy with a wild mass of long, frizzy black locks, banging away on lead guitar who was christened Saul Hudson when he was born in Hampstead, England but was now know by the far cooler name “Slash.”

Yep, that Slash.

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Centurion: How Many Times Can I Use “Brutal” in a Review?

Centurion: How Many Times Can I Use “Brutal” in a Review?

2852-FINAL_CENTURION 70x100op 50 %.inddCenturion (2010)
Directed by Neil Marshall. Starring Michael Fassbender, Dominic West, Olga Kurylenko.

If you did not see Centurion during its U.S. theatrical release, that’s probably because you blinked. The British film ran in only a small number of theaters in August on limited engagements, with a simultaneous release on Video on Demand. It played at the Nuart Theater a few miles from my home for a week, and I was unable to get to it. I regretted it at the time because the trailers got my thrill glands pumping: a bloody historical action movie starring a Roman legion. Now that is my kind of fun! I also had faith in director Neill Marshall; I had enjoyed all of his previous movies, and they more than proved that he could handle violent mayhem.

Now that Centurion is on DVD and Blu-Ray, I’ve been able to see what Mr. Marhsall did with the murky historical legend of the Ninth Legion: he made a bloody historical action movie out of it.

Centurion is as straightforward as they come, something the director admits: “It’s not meant to be historically perfect. I’m picking up on a legend and exploring it . . . it’s an action thriller.” The Ninth Legion, which supposedly vanished on an expedition to Scotland in the second century, serves as a springboard for Marhsall to return to the territory of “soldiers-behind-the-lines” from his first movie, the werewolf thriller Dog Soldiers, and sprinkle it with Xenophon’s Anabasis and various World War II movies featuring tough guys doing what has to be done. It is a stripped-to-the-bone bloodletting, filled with decapitations, throat-slittings, head-crushings, and any other mutilation you care to mention.

Not every movie needs deep psychological character explorations or nuanced drama. Centurion knows what it wants, runs after it, and spikes it gorily to the ground. If you think you might enjoy this film, then you will enjoy it — Marhsall delivers the goods as promised.

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Goth Chick News: 13 Questions for Catherine Mary Stewart

Goth Chick News: 13 Questions for Catherine Mary Stewart

image015The gentlemen staff of Black Gate tirelessly seeks out ways to entertain you. There have been cross-country zeppelin rides and waist-high stacks of manuscripts to pour over, seeking only the crème de la crème of stories to tell and the most interesting tidbits to pass along. The boys often go for days without showering, living only on beer and pizza while spending countless, sleepless hours reading the latest comics or playing the latest video games; all for your enjoyment and approval. During these marathon sessions of creativity, toilet sets are left up and the communal fridge sprouts intricate science experiments, which I am sure have some unobvious value.

It’s exhausting to watch, really.

But here in the underground bunker of Goth Chick News, we’re generally just concerned with the tequila supply and whether plugging in the blender while five Xboxes are going upstairs will cause a breaker to trip.

That is, until two weeks ago.

It was then that I brought you a collection of favorite scary movies from the 80’s, gleaned from an outwardly cool-looking, mixed group of New Years Eve revelers; with a goal to either remind you of a picture you’d forgotten, or tempt you into something classic that you may never have heard of.

As it turns out, plenty of you have heard of Catherine Mary Stewart.

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Goth Chick News: We’re Bats About New DVD Releases!

Goth Chick News: We’re Bats About New DVD Releases!

image0041The holidays are over and according to AccuWeather, approximately 70% of the United States has snow on the ground and for a whole lot of you, this may be just a rare enough occurrence that for the moment, you’re mildly amused. But trust me when I tell you the novelty of throwing it at each other, sliding down it, or for a select group of you, writing your name in it, is going to wear off. And that’s when the cabin fever sets in.

The reality is that 70% of otherwise (fairly) stable Americans are trapped like rats with family members, classmates or co-workers for another two months at minimum. We are all now horror-movie fodder, Steven King style, holed up without sunlight and fresh air; susceptible to maddeningly repetitive sounds like the British accent on that lizard in the insurance commercials, until the only remaining coherent thought is squishing him flat in your uninsured Hummer.

Or maybe that’s just me.

The point is, you’re in need of mind-diverting entertainment until the thaw comes; before you end up being the subject of an HBO special and some Dancing With the Stars contestant is playing you… badly.

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